Walked upstairs today and laid on bed and read Senselessness by Horacio Castellanos Moya from cover to cover. I kept loving the phrase "one thousand one hundred almost single spaced pages." Loving the long sentences. But kept trying to figure out what I felt about the gender stuff in it. I feel stupid saying that. It is all an ironic joke of a book after all. And still and despite kept attempting to compare the way woman are treated to the other "jokes" in the book. And then wondering what was a joke and what was not. Like how much of a joke was the manuscript about the governmental atrocities committed against the indigenous population? How much of a joke were the atrocities themselves, which keep popping up out of the one thousand one hundred almost single spaced pages and into the (short) book itself? (And this being one of the most interesting parts of the book.) And then why does the story about the woman who was raped at the end bother me so much more than the story about the deaf mute at the beginning? And then, at the end, does the more or less confirmation of the narrator's paranoia --"Everybody's fucked. Be grateful you left."--also confirm that Fatima's cunt is "putrid"?